The ULTIMATE friend/girlfriend/wife's Guide to Everything Team Sports

Maybe a cute boy recently invited you to his home to watch "the big game" with him and his buddies. Or, maybe you are a girlfriend trying to impress her boyfriend with sports knowledge. Or, maybe you are simply a devoted wife hoping to spend more time with your hubby by trying to be interested in things he is interested in. No matter the circumstance, this guide is for YOU.

In this Ultimate Guide, we will be discussing 6 team sports. Football, Basketball, Hockey, Baseball, Soccer, and Water Polo.

Let's start with the basics:

Common terms that you will hear in most sports:
OFFENSE: the people trying to score.
DEFENSE: the people trying to stop the other team from scoring.
OFF SIDES: Someone on one of the teams did something wrong, resulting in a penalty.
PENALTY: A punishment for one of the teams.
FOUL: Somebody did an illegal something toward another player. (Similar to a penalty in some sports).
FLOP: When a player makes it look like another player fouled them, but they really didn't.

Now, let's break it down into the sports:

FOOTBALL:
Your guy is probably watching either the NFL (National Football League) or College Football. The NFL comes after College Football. Most players play College Football to try to get into the NFL. If you aren't sure which he is watching, look in the corner of the screen. Most likely there will be a symbol that says "NFL" if he is watching and NFL game. If it is a College game it will say something else such as "Pac 12" or "NCAA" or some other letters jumbled together. You can also look to see if you can tell the average age of the players. NFL players will typically be much older than College players.

VIP names to know/say to sound knowledgeable: Peyton Manning, Eli Manning, Michael Vick, Joe Namath, Steve Young.

Scoring:
Touchdown: This is what they're trying to do the whole game. Get a touchdown. It is worth 6 points. After a touchdown, you can do a kick for an extra point, or do this thing where they line up near the end zone line and try for two points. 99% of the time, though, they do the kick.
Field Goal: Sometimes they don't get close enough to the Touchdown, so they do a field goal instead. It is worth 3 points.
Touch Back: Honestly, I've had this one explained to me a few times, and I still get confused. It is worth 2 points, and has something to do with being in your own end zone or something.

Common Terms:
Interception: The defensive team steals the ball from the offensive team (resulting in a lot of screaming).
Holding: Some player held onto another player making it so he can't run very well.
False Start: Somebody started moving before they were supposed to.
First/Second/Third/Fourth Down: They have 4 tries to get a touchdown. If you get confused, just replace the word "down" with "try."

Neutral things you can say that make it seem like you know what you are talking about:
- "I've seen better defensive lines that that. Of course, I've seen worse."
- "If they just get that ball a few more yards, they just might get that touch down!"

Championship: NFL: Super Bowl. (The one with all the funny commercials and a concert in the middle).
College: There's a ton of them. They all end in "bowl." Sugar Bowl, Rose Bowl, Tostito Bowl, etc.

Inspirational Movies with this sport:
Remember the Titans (my favorite movie!!)
Rudy
Blindside
Waterboy
Radio

Basketball:
Similar to Football, your man is probably watching the NBA (National Basketball Association) or College Basketball. Again, check the corner of the screen and the average age of the players.

VIP names to know/say: Michael Jordan, Shaq, John Stockton, Karl Malone, LeBron James, the Bird Man, Meta WorldPeace (yes, that is his real name), Charles Barkley (the guy in the funny cell phone commercials), Jimmer Ferdette, Larry Bird.

Scoring:
Making a basket is 2 points, unless you are behind the 3-point line. Then, it is worth 3-points. Also, if a player gets fouled, they get to shoot two baskets (sometimes, in rare cases, three), each one is worth one point.

Common Terms:
The Key: The colored box under the basket. The guys on defense aren't supposed to stand in it for more than like 5 seconds. But, usually the ref only calls that if he's bored.
Shot Clock: The clock that shows up in the corner of the screen. The guys can only have the ball for so long before shooting it. Also, it conveniently resets when the ball touches the rim.
Assist: When a player passes the ball to another player who then scores, the one who passed it to the scorer gets the "assist."
Technical Foul: When a player does something real bad. The other team gets to do a free throw without any of the other player standing around them. Oh, and they get the ball back after as well.

Neutral things you can say that make it seem like you know what you are talking about:
"You know, some people say Michael Jordan wouldn't be Michael Jordan without Scotty Pippen."
"They need to give it 110% and play as a team if they are going to win this thing."
"Kobe Bryant sure is a ball hog."

Championship:
NBA: NBA Championship. Best of 7.
College: NCAA Championship.

Inspriational Movies with this sport:
Hoosiers
IMAX: Michael Jordan
Heavyweights

HOCKEY:
Hockey is a high-impact, constantly moving sport. There are 5 players from each team on the ice at a time, plus each team's goalie. If your man is watching hockey, it is most likely the NHL (National Hockey League). When I first started watching hockey, I had a bit of a hard time with all the running-into-walls-running-into-other-people stuff. I realized it was because I was thinking of it like basketball. Once I started thinking about it as if it were more like football (high impact) it became much funner to watch! (PS-I still don't like the fighting aspect, but it is part of the culture of hockey...don't be surprised if you see players drop their gloves and start pummeling each other).

VIP names to know/say:
Wayne Gretzky, Patrick Roy, Joe Sakic, Gordie Howe, Mario Lemieux, Bobby Orr, Sidney Crosby. (Good luck pronouncing all those names. Google them if you need help.)

Scoring:
Get the puck past the goalie and into the net. 1 point. (They can't kick the puck in, but it can bounce off their skate into the goal...ummm...okay. That is why slow motion cameras were invented.)

Common Terms:
Icing: Someone on the defense flings the puck past the middle line and the end line without anyone else touching it. The puck has to come back to their defensive zone. (Unless they have someone in the penalty box)
Penalty Box: Where someone goes when they did something illegal in hockey. Affectionately referred to as the "sin bin." You can get put in the "sin bin" for illegal checks (see below), fighting, tripping, hooking, high stick, too many guys on the ice, and using your stick or skate as a lethal weapon.
Power Play: When one team has a player in the penalty box, the team that has 5 players is on a "power play" (they have more players on the ice).
Checking: When one player makes intentional and forceful physical contact with another player. Legal forms of checking: hip check, stick check, open ice check, checking on the boards/walls, money check. Illegal forms of checking: back check, face check, cross check, hair check, toe check, armpit check, inner ear check.

Championship:
Stanley Cup Final. Best of 7.

Inspirational Movies about this sport:
Miracle
D2: Mighty Ducks

BASEBALL:
America's Pastime. Grab a hot dog. There are 9 innings in baseball. Teams take turns in the outfield and batting. When a team is in the outfield, their goal is to get the other team "out" three times. When a team is batting, they are trying to get as many people to home plate as they can and not get "out."

VIP names to know/say:
Babe Ruth, Joe Dimaggio, Jackie Robinson, Yoggie Berra

Scoring:
Each player that touches home base gets one point for their team.

Common Terms:
Home Run: When a player hits the ball so far, they can make it around all the bases and to home plate without getting out on a single hit.
Strike: When the batter misses hitting the ball. (If one batter gets 3 of these, he is out.)
Bases loaded: There is a player on 1st, 2nd, and 3rd base.
Short Stop: Ummm...I think it is the position between 2nd and 3rd base?
Stealing: There are certain points that players can run between bases when the ball hasn't been hit yet.

Championship:
World Series. It's a big deal.

Inspirational Movies about this sport:
Sandlot
The Rookie
Angels in the Outfield
42

SOCCER: (I have to admit, this is the sport I know the least about.)
There are ten players on the field from each team, plus their goalie. They run around kicking the ball, trying to make it into the goal. They aren't allowed to use their hands.

VIP names to know/say:
David Beckham, Kyle Beckerman, Cristiano Ronaldo.

Championship:
The World Cup. It really is the WORLD. It is very intense.

Inspirational Movies about this sport:
Invictus (Oh wait...that's rugby)
Forever Strong (Oh wait...that's rugby)

WOW!! That is A LOT to remember!! If you are overwhelmed, just take it one step at a time. What is your man's favorite sport? Start there and work your way through all of them.

Also, BONUS! If you are feeling completely overwhelmed, we here at Three Thisters have made a simple printable for you to keep in your purse. (We are also working on a "circle version" which can be kept in your compact mirror for quick glances if you are put on the spot).
Please also note, there is a spot for notes. This is for you to place anything that you would like to put there to help you remember that sport.

DIY: Patriotic Crafty Treat

I don't know about you, but my family loves the 4th of July. This year I decided to come up with a way to show my patriocity through some cute treats.

 1. Buy these. I got mine at Smith's for $2.00

2. Take out one twizzler


















3. Peel off 3 pieces (preferably red, white, and blue)

4. Peel them apart from the bottom.
(Three thister note: If you do what I accidentally did and pull them all the way apart, don't worry, just lick the piece where you want it to stick and it kind of works.)










4. Braid them, like you would hair.

5. Until it looks like this.













6. Repeat steps 1-5.













7. Then put them together in the shape of a heart.
















8. Hopefully your loved ones will love it as much as mine did!

PS Happy 4th of July! ~ThreeThisters

HOW TO: Pit your Avocado

My husband and I enjoy a good guac mix every once in a while. We also frequently put avocados on our tacos, toastadas, etc. Getting the pit out of the avocado can be quite the chore! I used to use the method I call the, "try not to lose a finger" method. This method involves whacking the pit of the avocado with a knife, and pulling. Flaws to this method include: 1. If the knife isn't in the pit far enough, it comes out. 2. If the knife is too far into the pit, the pit may come out with some difficulty, resulting into some possible knife to the nose flinging action. Neither of these are good options. So, after some observations, I have finally found a sensible alternative.
Step one: (Similar to step one of the "try not to lose a finger" method):
Whack the pit with a knife.

Step 2: (This one is REALLY important, it sets the two methods apart):

TWIST the knife that is in the avocado.

Step three: 

PULL the avocado pit out of the avocado.

I have found this way is SIGNIFICANTLY easier than the other method.

Click the link below to visit our Youtube channel and see a video.

Three Thisters Guide to Toilets, Sinks, and Hand-drying Options in Public Restrooms

We were showing some friends from out of state around town a few weeks ago and visiting a public restroom here and there in the process. I became very aware of all the many methods there are for using the toilet, washing, and drying your hands. I wondered if any of our readers could be perplexed by all the options available from restroom to restroom and decided to present a guide here that I hope can be useful to you. Most people generally use the restroom in three stages, the toilet, then handwashing, then hand-drying. Each of these stages offer either a manual or motion-activated form of use, each of which I will cover here.

Toilets:

Some have a lever you push or pull when done. Some have a button. And some are motion activated and everything's taken care of almost before you can realize it's gone.

Sinks:

Some have a manual faucet. Others have a motion-activated sensor. And some dang things require you to push with one hand while you wash the other. Heh. Try doing that with a baby in your arms.

There is a small sub-category here, Soap dispensers:

Some you push manually, some have a motion activated sensor.

Hand-drying options:

Paper towels: Some you pull down manually. Some are motion activated by a wave of your hand.

Hot air blowers: Some require you to push a button. Others are motion activated, again by a wave of your hand.

As I outlined this information for our readers, I started to pick up on a trend. Each stage of the restroom experience is either manual or motion-activated, and can be recognized in the following ways:

Manual:
Most manual options will have a lever, or something to push or pull. In some cases, "PULL" will even be inscribed on some dispensers. This is not to be confused with a picture of a waving hand, which is solely for motion-activated paper towel dispensers.

Motion-Activated:
Sometimes the unit will be labeled "motion-activated." It is also possible that you will be able to locate a red, laser-like sensor. Stand in front of the sensor. In the case of toilets, whether or not it is labeled, all you must do is stand up.

I have included a printable here. Please download, print, and distress the edges with either a brown ink-pad or soaking with tea-bags and drop it in your purse as an easy reference the next time you or a little one has to go.

HOW TO: Make Shot Put Bread

The smell of Italian pasta is in the air. An undeniable and overpowering desire for garlic bread fills your soul. 
"Grocery store.... here I come!" You go to grab your keys.

No.

You decide you're gonna do this pioneer style. That's right. You're going to make your own bread. Garlic Shot Put Bread.

This is the bread BEFORE you shot put-itize it. It's okay.... but nothing makes you say "bon appetite" like a bread that requires an average of 53 chews for each swallowable bite!
 
I'm going to be frank and say that I'm not really sure how I achieved the beauty of my shot put bread. I guess you could say it's the magic in my hands. But I'll do my best to describe it here so people don't start referring to me as the Selfish Shot Put Bread Hog. 

1. Follow the recipe exactly.
2. Read each direction 5 times before, during, AND after you follow each step. Like really.
3. I learned this one long ago- detach your self-esteem from your cooking (you don't want to get TOO prideful).
4. And VUALA! You have yourself some delicious and mostly edible shot put bread!

P.S. If you want the ingredients/measurements, give me a ring.

 

HOW TO: Share Your Peach Milkshake

You buy a milkshake. Everyone wants a sip, but no one is exactly sure how to make it fair. Let's be honest, you want to be the dominate sipper without others' recognizing it. You've been there before. Well, fret no more! I'm going to share with you a cute and crafty way to secretly dominate the sipping and fancy up your milkshake sharing experiences.

1. Count how many people want a sip of your milkshake.

2. Take the number you counted to and memorize it.

3. Go to the straw dispenser and get that same number of straws.

I had counted to 3, I picked up 3

4. Open the straw wrapping.

Like this.

5. Remember the number you counted to... think of a shape that has the same number of vertices. 

(2- line segment, 3-equilateral triangle, 4-square, 5-regular pentagon, 6-regular hexagon, 7-regular hexagon, etc. )

6. Place the straws in your milkshake in that shape.

equilateral triangle

7. Sip...and secretly dominate. 

How to get and use a banana slicer.

How to get and use a banana slicer.
Maybe you have seen this banana slicer before in the grocery store. Today, I am going to tell you how to get and use one of these.

STEP 1: Go on a Disney cruise. Why is this important? What does it have to do with a banana slicer? That will become significant in a minute.

STEP 2: Meet a really cool guy named Joe. Joe will be crucial in your banana slicing journey. (PS-this step is CRUCIAL. If you go on a Disney cruise and do not meet a cool guy named Joe, you MUST return to step 1.)
STEP 3: Invite Joe to come and stay with your family for a fun-filled vacation.
STEP 4: Have Joe buy you a banana slicer. (This may or may not be a tricky step. Some people find that their friend Joe will just give them a banana slicer on his own. Others have found that their friend Joe has needed a little hint here and there to give them a banana slicer.)
STEP 5: Slice your banana with your new banana slicer.